Birdwalk

While waiting for my pants to emerge from the washer

A few confessions, if you don't mind. I hear it is good for the soul.

First, I am fairly sure I am losing my mind. Twice in the past month I've surprised myself by saying snotty things to people who only somewhat are asking for it. It was almost like I had no control over what was coming out of my mouth...it just goes from brain to mouth without me even being aware of it first, I have no chance to stop it before it's out. I almost feel like I should not be blamed for it because I had no warning, no choice. I'd like to blame it on PMS or stress or whatever but maybe I need to make peace with the idea that, deep down, I am just a nasty bitch.

Second, I will admit to taking a tiny sliver of delight in someone else's discomfort. There is a nice married couple in my complex, they live a few doors down from us. They are both personal trainers and they both run marathons. I am ashamed of myself when I am around them because they are thin and healthy and happy all the time. The wife has legs I would literally kill for. Anyway, I was chatting with the husband the other day and he was telling me that they had been sick recently. And it occurred to me that they seem to be sick a lot. And I couldn't help but gloat just a little because I haven't been sick all winter. Perhaps, I thought, if they had a little more body fat they wouldn't get sick all the time. Then I spent the next half hour berating myself for that thought.